Death belongs to everyone, it's the only thing that we have....The Mekons (Blow Your Tuneless Trumpet)
I was talking to Martin Daniels about the passing of Alex Chilton tonight, the power pop pioneer of Big Star but also a teenage blue eyed rock and soul teenager with The Box Tops. He passed away today at age 59 but also another musician Dan Ducey from Junkhouse also too suffered a heart attack and died as well. It got me to thinking about my life and all the ranting and raving that I do that even I'm surprised that I haven't suffered one or a stroke. I also pondered that idea while chatting with my girlfriend to which she begged me not to say anything more about that. She's not into hospitals.
Nobody knows when the time comes for us to depart the afterlife. Growing old is such a pain in the ass but the alternative isn't much better if you have loved ones you leave behind. If you're a musician that everybody knows, you get plenty of thought at Twitter and the music online sites. Alex Chilton was loved by the alternative rock crowd, The Replacements named a song after him and he played on Can't Hardly Wait on the next album they did. Big Star didn't sell many albums, they were on the poorly distrubuted Stax label and whoever got copies of #1 Record went on to form their own power pop bands. When I wanted to listen to Alex Chilton I usually put on The Box Tops Greatest Hits instead of Big Star's albums. Sister Lovers, the third Big Star album people consider his shining moment but for me it remains Neon Rainbow which was a minor hit but the imagery of that song does make you feel like your walking down a rainy evening on Beale Street under a neon rainbow of barlights and such. Sure the bigger hits you know by heart; The Letter, Cried Like a Baby but I also vouch for Soul Deep, Choo Choo Train, She Shot A Hole In My Heart and the B side to I Met Her In Church, People Gonna Talk. Sure Dan Penn and Spooner Oldham may have wrote the words but Chilton pours his soul into it. And his voice sounded much older than his 19 years. Teenage white boy soul done the best way possible. And now he's gone. 59 years is not a long time if you lived that long; I lived 49 and it seems like only yesterday I was a small boy spinning Choo Choo Train and rocking back and forth on my portible rocking chair. Big Star was slated to play in Memphis in May of this year but that's a moot point now. They lost their voice.
You love her and she loves him, and he loves somebody else you just can't win....J. Geils Band (Love Stinks)
If there's a place for a reality show it should be where I work at. It's never a dull moment at Testscores R Us Inc. Especially during spring processing, when we go into the ghetto and pull out some of the more finer gangbangers, dingbats and halfwits to drive us perms up the wall. Can't find a parking spot to save your ass in the winter months and of course nothing more fun that going out to the parking lot and having some whitethugga playing rap music or some Ho rattling her windows with Lil' Wayne. God, I miss the days before rap, when people actually played music. Basically I have a good friend that we all like, she's a bit LOUD and VOCAL and TALKS ALL THE TIME but the one thing she's not good of is that she really lacks good judgement. She's in love (or lust) with the black dude she co works with and the dude is a playa, I told her that, my other friend there tells her that, hell even the boss told her that. Romance in the officeplace is very much frown upon, especially if you're fighting over the other woman. And the other woman is another dumb blonde who likes to take a walk on the black side. And this chick will steal the fillings out of your mouth if your not careful and of course walks with a birth control patch just in case the moment is right. Makes a great reality show, maybe I could pitch it to MTV since they like to put that kind of crap out anyway.
Our friend is pushing thirty and the one thing she would like to have is her own baby, or two, or five?!? But she can't afford one much less five since she has a big fondness for booze. I've tried to sit her down and explain the situation that with this dude, that he's not going to settle down with anybody and will continue to have the roving eye and go pop Miss Dumb Blonde when my friend gets drunk and passes out. After all she started going out with him after he dropped his original girlfriend. I hope that for everybody's sake that she doesn't bring a child into this world. She's not ready, he's not interested and nobody wins especially the baby. And I've seen too much of that in my own backyard, with the doofus across the street not working and bringing the GF into the house to which they can live rentfree while he sits around skateboarding and smoking cigarettes and fighting with her. Our friend should deserves better but she's not the smartest cookie in the place and knowing how things are going to be, I'm sure she'll be an unwed mother within a year or so. You don't have to be a Nostradamus to figure these out, just sit back and observe.
Finding love is the hardest in the world to do. Took me a good 48 years and a few times of finding, falling and failing to finally find that special one. It's trial and error and E harmony and Match.com can't teach you that. There's a follower that I read that documents her dates and that takes some effort to do. I also think that she's a bit hard to please. It's one thing to set high standards, you don't want somebody whose going to be a two timer or a lazy bum who only makes you not want to date ever again. Or the split personality woman whose wacked out on drugs and goes behind your back and tells the chatroom that you left her instead. Or the one that doesn't know the value of the dollar since she's already spent it. Been there done that and if that didn't make me become a hermit or gay, those reasons make a good argument to stay single.
True love is work and it's everyday 24/7. You have to explain the rules and your wants and needs and see if your other half is going to be that compatible, or if they're trying to change you. Ain't going happen, you can't change yourself to accomindate others. You're just bullshitting yourself. You can't change you and you can't change her. So you have to compromise.
It's here in black and white and thankfully I have a woman that loves me still even after I explain of who I am and what I do best. I've known her over 9 years so she knows the situation. But unlike the last of my failed loves, she's willing to go the extra mile to work things out and to keep a open mind and to be a friend and lover whenever time is right. But she's a great supporter in the things that I do. To myself, love is taken one day at a time to which that you build a foundation and go down that long road of life together and overcome the problems and temptations that end relationships.
I don't look at death as the end but rather a new beginning. I believe that when I fall in love with somebody it will be forever just like Stevie Wonder sang a long time ago. And in the afterlife spend forever with the one that I love most.
That's my ideal of true love.
